Dear Lady on Social Media who Lost a Child to Fentanyl

As many of you know, I am a teacher. Last year, I decided to switch school districts to be closer to home. I applied at an elite school that everyone wants their child to be in, and to say it was quite the change is an understatement, some in good ways (hardly any fights) and others that were appalling (prejudice and entitlement).

Now before I go any further, let me say that I still valued each and every child in my classroom. I'm just noting the culture of the school to better paint the picture for you of an incident that happened towards the end of the school year. This happened in a top-notch, A-grade high school.

A police officer came to present a video showing the dangers of Fentanyl, a powerful drug that is being laced in other drugs, unbeknownst to the buyer. It seems the stronger drug can make a person become addicted far more quickly and the smallest of amounts can kill you. According to UCLA Health, 22 high school-aged students a week died from Fentanyl-laced prescription pills in 2022. A lot more is being laced than just the pills, so that is probably just the tip of the iceberg.

From the very start of the video, every time a drug was shown or the use of a drug was shown, the auditorium would erupt in thunderous applause and cheers. It was so bad they had to stop the video and  turn on the lights. An administrator took the microphone to chastise the students and threaten them with repercussions if they continued. 

It was embarrassing on the surface, the lack of respect alone was mortifying, but what does it mean underneath the surface, in terms of drug use or tolerance towards it? Were the students just showboating for their peers? Or does it run deeper? I have no idea.

Today, on social media, I saw where a parent shared the story of her 17-year-old dying from taking something that was laced with Fentanyl. Maybe she did it as an outlet for her grief. Maybe she did it to enlighten others so they would talk to their children. Maybe it was a combination of reasons. No one would know but her. The comments though, were rough. 

I know people on social media can be harsh, but this lady lost her only child, and people were repeatedly saying it was her fault. I've written this for her. She will probably never see the post, but I want to say this: it's not your fault. 

As a teacher in a school full of refined children who will open the door for you, always speak politely to you, consider their grades important, have their life plans already forming (and are taking action steps to get there), and so on and so forth, I GUARANTEE you their parents have no idea what kind of behavior they exhibited in the auditorium that day. I guarantee you they do not believe their children would purchase a drug laced with Fentanyl, much less take it. I guarantee you they do not think it could be their child. And let's hope they are right. But statistics show that maybe they are not.

You can't know everything your child will or will not do. All you can do is educate them, hope they listen and pray they never take the opportunity to say yes to a substance they shouldn't be touching. And even then, they still might and if they do, it's not your fault. It's not your fault.  Where in the world is the empathy? My heart goes out to that mother who shared on social media, and to all of the parents who have lost a child to Fentanyl. I can only imagine the pain that lingers from that kind of a hurt. 

What is the action plan? I don't know. And my little post online will only be seen by a very small number of people. It won't help anyone or anything. But I wanted you to know... 

because all of this, is not a small problem.